A Guide for The Newly Out Lesbian on Dating Women
You’ve just come out as a gay woman and you haven’t the foggiest idea of how to meet women, where to go, or how to approach them – let alone date them. And that is completely normal. In this society, we’re taught all about the birds and the bees, and heterosexual dating. Unfortunately, when it comes to dating someone of the same sex, many feel completely lost because it’s not a topic that is addressed as often as dating tips for straight people. And let’s face it; dating women is way harder than dating men. A mere bat of the eyelashes and a semi-short skirt is enough to get any guy’s pulse racing. Lesbian women on the other hand, are elusive. You need to know how to approach the act of lesbian dating to prevent fumbling in the figuratively created dark.
The first step to starting your gay dating life is to seek out a fellow lesbian. It doesn’t have to be a friend or someone you know very well – it could just be a person you may have met a few times at your local watering hole. Ask them about the scene in your town, or some of the best places to go that may be useful to try out. The lesbian community is extremely welcoming of (newly) out women and this person will be the first to introduce you to your new lifestyle.
Another rule of thumb when it comes to lesbian women is that – everyone knows everyone. Once you’ve got yourself a friend in the community, you’ll have the opportunity to meet more women with the same goals and sexual orientation as you.
If you can’t find a fellow gay woman, try mustering up the courage to visit a gay bar alone. As previously mentioned, everyone knows everyone – so when you’re the new chick sitting at the bar, many will be tempted to chat with you.
And lastly (and most importantly), you should be extremely lucky that online dating is such a huge thing of late. Scoping out apps for lesbian women or finding a bisexual dating site is the easiest way to getting yourself into the lesbian scene. Additionally, you don’t even need to use sites that are solely for members of the LGBT community. There are many “straight” dating apps that are just as welcoming to people of different sexual orientations.
Before you do make use of these apps however, be certain to make your intentions clear. As there are no specific guidelines as to what kinds of people can use the sites, it will make your life a lot easier if you state who you are and what you’re looking for. This will save you tons of time when matching with straight women who are clearly looking for a threesome with her boyfriend.
Conclusively, it’s definitely understandable that you’re feeling strange, like a fish out of water – but this is only the start of your fruitful and adventurous life as a newly out lesbian woman. The community is welcoming, so join in.